Thursday, February 24, 2005 argh..crap dae...went 2 sch at 10am 2dae coz i dun hafta attend PE n maths tutorial was cancelled coz mr heng nt in sch....decided 2 pon TCP's hist lect coz its kinda redundant...but in e end at 1030am 10 of my classmates including myself decided to attend his lect coz TCP sort of realised tt half of A5 was absent....den at 1110am....e dreaded maths test...i tink i screwed it up coz e curve sketchin was absolute crap....worst of all i still tink tt its a veri managable paper...in fact could haf been much more challenging....but tink my mind was jus nt workg properly...esp when i was doin e integration qns....i knew it was incorrect but i continues aniwae....better den leaving tt qns blank...mite as well jus try my luck...mayb a few steps correct can gain sum marks....i dun tink i will fail dis test though...but jus tt i wun score well enuf 4 my own satisfaction...i dun deserve anything lesser den a pass because ive worked hard enuf 4 dis test...but once again...WHU NOES.....workg hard doesnt mean workg smart...can sum1 tell me how 2 work smart....it seems like 2 work smart once is more significant workg hard 100 times....i keep tellin myself i cannot fail e 1st maths test of e term...coz usualli when i fail once...it becomes a sort of chain effect or shld i sae a vicious cycle....cant seem 2 break out of it....moreover maths haf been my strongest subject all e while....it wld be reallie demoralising 2 flung it....sighz....tink its another problem wif expections.....greater e xpectations den greater e disappointment....4 expectations r e roots of all heartaches!!
major turn off by sum irritants in class 2dae...wif e bad mood i was in...i was totalli pist n fed up...jus sum small matter over financial issues n we had 2 go thru a whole series of trouble...end up gettin so mani pple implicated n eventually into a conflict tt splits e class into 2 major 'cliques'....may be wondering y i highlighted e word 'clique'...coz technically speakin i hope 2 nt belong 2 either of e camps.....i jus wanna b left alone...STOP IRRITATING ME.....so wat if im e CT rep...dun involve me....its none of my business and seriously do u all tink i even care....in e 1st place i was force 2 take up e role of a CT rep...n now 2 hell wif all dis shit...get alife man....complain tt dere's no mutual trust in e class...ITS E FACT....e class jus isnt united...forget it...onli 8 mths left....after 'A's we'll jus go our own ways n live our own lives....wats e point of tryin 2 force myself 2 like e class n enjoy their company when in actual fact i reallie dun.....its nt dat i dun wanna cherish e 8 mths ive left together wif my present class but dere's reallie nuthin i wanna cherish about......wats e purpose of tryin so hard 2 gel e entire class together when every1 jolly well noe tt it isnt gg 2 work out.....jus 2 bad....we've pple tts jus too different or shld i shld indifferent.....all dis crap tts happening in sch jus make me tink n mish A6 more....though A6 havent been an exceptionalli close or united class...but at least pple dere were more sensible n fun-loving....at least i tot so...time realli flies....its bout time all my ex-classmates receive their A levels results...3 mths jus flew pass like tt.....sigh....cant wait 4 e 'A's 2 cum n go asap...onli den i need nt face a bunch of irritating n senseless morons.....nt attendin sch tml....went 4 blood donation in sch jus now e it seems like im quite unfortunate all e time.....e nurse tt attended 2 me actualli broke my valves...now my left arm is swollen n unable 2 bend.....gosh....last time my veins collaspe n now my valves broken....wats next man....my heart fail or smthg?!? *touchwood*.....haiz....need a gd rest away frm irritants....so im jus gonna bum ard at hm tml n study national income accounting 4 e upcomin econs test on mondae..... 
